A Million Tears
by Jirachi the Legend
Summary: A young trainer says his last goodbye to the Pokemon he thought would be by his side forever.


**A Million Tears**

_Disclaimer: Song featured is If Only Tears Could Bring You Back from the Pokemon: The First Movie Soundtrack._

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_How will I start,_  
_Tomorrow without you here_  
_Whose heart will guide me?_  
_When all the answers disappear_  
_Is it too late?_  
_Are you too far gone to stay?_  
_Best friends forever_  
_Should never have to go away_  
_What will I do?_  
_You know I'm only half without you_  
_How will I make it through?_

It's a tempestuous autumn day. Harsh winds bite at your face and hands as you sit solemnly under an old oak tree. Bright orange and brown leaves litter the ground as if trying to cover up the lush green grass below, and gray clouds roll overhead, promising you a downpour. You can't see the bright leaves, the green grass or even the pastel pink of the tiny daisy that is growing by your feet; to you the whole world is gray and everything you see is a blur.

You would never have pictured yourself here on a fresh autumn morning, but then again, you could never have predicted the events of that night.

Thunder rumbles overhead but you take no notice of what's happening around you. Your emotionless eyes are fixed to the grey stone that protrudes so unnaturally from the earth before you.

He would have hated its artificial look; its dull, miserable form, and the way it stood out so noticeably from everything around it.

But you suppose that doesn't matter anymore. Nothing really matters.

_If only tears could bring you back to me_  
_If only love could find a way_  
_What I would do_  
_What I would give if you_  
_Returned to me someday_  
_Somehow someway_  
_If my tears could bring you back to me_

You stare at the tombstone, allowing the words that are so carefully engraved upon it to sink into your mind.

Deep down you still haven't accepted the fact that he has left you. You expect him to be there when you turn around. You see him out of the corner of your eye and hear his voice in your head, but every time you take a second to think you lose him all over again.

You feel a sudden change in the air and before you know it the heavens have opened and rain is pouring down around you. You welcome the cool liquid on your face and allow it to seep into your skin, not making any effort to shelter yourself from the downpour.

Before you, the tiny daisy is pelted mercilessly by the rain. Without even thinking you pluck it from the earth.

_I'd cry you an ocean_  
_If you'd sail on home again_  
_Waves of emotion_  
_Will carry you and all they can_  
_Just let love guide you_  
_And your heart will chart the course_  
_Soon you'll be drifting_  
_Into the arms of your true north_  
_Look in my eyes, you'll see_  
_A million tears have gone by_  
_And still they're not dry_

You feel tears pricking at the corner of your eyes, but you refuse to let them go. You're not afraid to cry for him, but afraid that if you start crying, you'll never be able to stop.

Above you, brilliant flashes of lightning illuminate the sky. You forget your emotionless state for a second and look up at the spectacular lightshow. You think of the way he used to sit out in the rain with you to watch the storms roll in. He always loved the rain.

A cool wind picks up, ruffling your hair and clothes and making you shiver slightly. The branches of the great oak tree sway madly in the breeze, their crazed dance complementing your hopeless mood perfectly.

Through the unrelenting rain you look down at the tiny flower in your hand; each perfect petal being harassed by the downpour. You hold one hand high above the small daisy so that rain cascades over your skin, but leaves the little flower untouched. Looking down at the petite petals evokes a powerful sense of déjà vu and you get the daunting feeling that you've held the life of something so precious in your hands before.

_If only tears could bring you back to me_  
_If only love could find a way_  
_What I would do_  
_What I would give if you_  
_Returned to me someday_  
_Somehow someway_  
_If my tears could bring you back to me_

And then you can hold on no more.

All at once the tears gather in your eyes until they overflow and begin to cascade down your already wet cheeks. They fall to the ground, mixing with the rain so that the two are indistinguishable.

It seems like the world is crying with you as you sit there in the rain. You have become so void of sensation that you can no longer feel the cold water dripping down your neck.

You think of all the things you never got to say, and all the things you wish you never said.

_I'd hold you close_  
_And shout the words_  
_I'd only whispered before_  
_For one more chance_  
_For one last dance_  
_There's not a thing_  
_I would not endure_

"Please…" you cry to the heavens as your whole body begins to shake. You let your emotions run rampant, not bothering to hide your distress any longer. You'd do anything to bring him back, even trade your own life for his.

A million questions run through your mind, but "Why?" is the only thing you can mutter as you move forward towards the grey stone. You reach out slowly, your numb fingers brushing against the cool rock.

You bow your head as the tears continue falling down your cheeks. Around you the heavens are still crying.

_If only tears could bring you back to me_  
_If only love could find a way_  
_What I would do_  
_What I would give if you_  
_Returned to me someday_  
_Somehow someway_  
_If my tears could bring you back to me..._

You drop the crumpled flower upon his grave and walk out of the cemetery without looking back.

All the tears in the world can't help you now.


End file.
